One thing that has plagued me over and over again is my emotional battle with social media, specifically Instagram. Don’t get me wrong, I love Instagram just as much as the next person, and if I am completely honest then I must admit to the addictive pull it has over. However, that addiction, at times, results in anxiety. Because I feel so passionately about my music and my expressions through writing, I feel this overwhelming pull to make my Instagram look amazing. Not just amazing, but the best ever so that people will want to follow me, like me, accept me, and onward. At the end of the day, I know that deep down it’s all smoke and mirrors, and that most accounts only show perfectly curated moments of highly retouched and manipulated pictures, that are of snippets of perfection. My higher self knows better, but like the masses, I fall prey.
I read and examine a lot of different bloggers who have these fabulous feeds; just gorgeous, artistic, witty and well seemingly perfect. Then I clunk through mine, and vow to never look at Instagram again. I have been going through these bouts more often lately. When I take breaks from social media, where I don’t post or look at anything for days, I begin to reconnect with myself, give my hold self a nice break, and ultimately feel more at peace. I envy those of you who are not on any social media, and that never will be because you are just too present in your real beautiful life. However, someone like me who wants share my music and my words uses this remarkable forum to reach many. I know that the greatest writers and musicians did not have blogs or Instagram accounts, and still managed to shift the people of the world in the miraculous way that only the arts can. I guess I’m somewhere in between. Floating back to simpler times and then vying for position in the cyber world. For all of you out there that share this struggle, I feel you, I see you, and I’m right there along side of you trying to figure it out too.